(((Rotting Corpse Mistaken For Al Goldstein)))
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You lowlife scumbag pricks - I am fucking a viable, living human (albeit demonstrably worn out). There is no way I can write this fucking blog in this gulag. My lawyer, Charles, visits me with pastrami and the New York Times, but for him to transcribe my notes to this fucking blog would require him to walk and chew gum at the same time (and he is Italian, a dego guinea wop street lawyer who has the gift of talk, but not the gift of walking and talking at the same time).
I live on the 13th Floor of the VA Hospital in Brooklyn. If you want proof that I still exist, come up here and visit me you fucking cum-filled anal fistula! Bring Katz’ patrami ONLY…unless you want to open up your checkbook and show your genorosity.
I fuck all of you in the ass, hold the vaseline. You losers! What the fuck did you think? That I just sat here on the ward all day and ponder you assholes who actually READ my fucking blog!?? FUCCCCCK YOU!
Let’s get back to reality. I want to get the fuck out of this shithole immediately. My life is not over yet. I am planning to make it to Florida (like Ratso Rizzo in Midnight Cowboy!). I can live off Social Security and bang some old Jewish cunt whose husband left her a forutne.Â
Does anyone have a spare condo that they would let me stay in until the Fall? I am serious.
Fuck you and I will be back.Â
FUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKK YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU!
Â
Al
April 16th, 2009 at 5:15 pm
fake
April 16th, 2009 at 5:21 pm
Al,
Why don’t you live in a public restroom in a park down in Florida. You could probably suck some gay dick if you can stand the pugent stale piss smell.
xoxoxo
April 16th, 2009 at 6:32 pm
Can someone verify that the “clown prince of porn” is where he say’s he is and that he is coherent? For all we know somebody could be “ghosting” this while Al lies in a semi-vegetable state in the VA hospital. I hope it really is Al writing these blog posts and not Booble’s attempt to cash in on the legend that is Al Goldstein. Also video proof would be nice. And finally fuck all of you!
April 17th, 2009 at 10:28 am
This was NOT written by Al!
If these blogs are no longer original from Mr. Goldstein himself,
Then take this section of booble down!
(THIS BLOG DOES NOT CONTAIN AL GOLDSTEIN’S EFFORTS ANYMORE)
April 17th, 2009 at 10:34 am
bob and muchspace,
Yeah, it’s all a big conspiracy, you slobbering, knuckle-dragging retards.
Fuck both of you!
April 17th, 2009 at 4:34 pm
Yeah Al, if the worms and maggots haven’t got to you yet and the dog hasn’t chewed off your limbs, we [fans]demand a picture. Or no photo because you look like a skeleton? Tell Carlo the lawyer to do the honor.
April 18th, 2009 at 10:59 am
Charming fellow.
April 18th, 2009 at 5:40 pm
If poor Ratso Rizzo had to make a hospital his last lowlife residence instead of streeting it with a midnight cowboy, he’d be porn’s own Al Goldstein. In these your golden years the state of New York should give you your freedom so you can swan song a last porn hurrah away from the bluenoses. As a ward of quacks drugging you to death in your old age, your only recourse from institutionalization is to escape out west to porn. Unless you cum full circle and be a mascot to the dirty movie set, you’ll leave this world in vain. So much for your New York state of mind.
April 19th, 2009 at 2:55 pm
I’m sure it’s Al, and he’s inviting you to visit him; so pick up your sorry asses and GO. The V.A. Hospital has a phone, call them to see if Al is still alive and coherent and able to have visitors. Find out the hours for visiting; or don’t any of you have the brains to figure that out. Meanwhile; Al…put an ad on Craigslist to see if anyone out there remembers you and will put you up in their spare bedroom or fishing boat. Remember the good old days when they were honored to have us fishing on their boats? I’m sure it still can happen. Be well….M.
April 19th, 2009 at 11:15 pm
SO, YOU want to live in a Florida condo? You scumbag let Rose Robbins TAKE 2 of your condos in Bocca for her cunt kids!!! What the fuck were you thinking!! Everyone tried to warn you old man. You had a great staff but you didnt listen. Too fuckin bad, eat shit.
April 20th, 2009 at 12:56 am
Your totally right Moose from Screw,
I reside in California, So heading over there at this point is
not going to work, but I like your phone call idea!
I’m going to try calling and post the results here if you’d like.
Eric
April 23rd, 2009 at 10:27 pm
If you are in Germany, you can come stay with me. My father, who was the famous (in Germany) transvestite Koko LePuffe used to speak of you.
Thinking of your Cock!
Bruno Leicht
May 10th, 2009 at 2:58 pm
Al, the quality of your writing used to be sharp, clever, vicious. Your editorials were pitch-perfect righteous rants. Now, you’ve reduced yourself to bemoaning being a lonely old man in the most hellish place in Brooklyn. Why don’t you suck Penn Jillette’s cock and get him to buy you a small place? I’m sure he would. If I could help you, I’d be glad to. My girlfriend is offering her body, but our apartment is too small for your once-ample frame. And we live in Oregon, so that’s way the fuck away from where you’d be most comfortable.
I was watching the “Celebrities” volume of the “Midnight Blue” DVDs and it’s full of those hairy, sleazy days when you were fat and rich and knew all the hip people and went to all the right parties - and bitched about it to your viewers if you weren’t invited. Those were your salad days. These could be your halcyon days; don’t give up.
May 11th, 2009 at 10:43 am
Is New York, which has rid itself of all things pornish, now holding you prisoner in a hospital? Are there are no jobs as an usher in a jerkoff theater where you can live in the restroom in between mopping up the sticky floors? Oops, smut movie houses are obsolete? Al, I like to kid you, but we really do miss all your rants. It helps us old souls live in the past. And so what happened to your good old days schitch?
May 12th, 2009 at 6:01 am
Al,
Whats going on with your educated, successful son? Why isn’t he helping you? Why don’t you let him know about your plight? Is he afraid you’ll do somthing creepy or harmful around his family? Cum’on Al we, former ‘Fuck-You-segment’ fans deserve to know.
On another note; did you ever know a NYC based pro porn lawyer by the name of, Ralph Schwartz?
-Gruberg fan
May 14th, 2009 at 11:37 am
I just called the VA hospital in Brooklyn and they have no record of any Al Goldstein.
And there you have it.
May 28th, 2009 at 10:44 am
Al, can you still eat solid foods at the VA or are you chowing down puree?
June 3rd, 2009 at 10:02 am
So where’s the fucking fuck you statue, you Jew fuck?
June 3rd, 2009 at 7:29 pm
I wish I could lie around in bed all day, read, watch TV, grab the nurses when their not looking, write shit on toilet paper for my dego lawyer to post on my blog for all you ungrateful cocksuckers, including me, waiting for somebody to bring me pastrami from some New York jew deli…I tell you that Al Goldstein has the life.
June 11th, 2009 at 10:19 am
Rest in piss Alvin!
..and suck a dick moose
June 11th, 2009 at 3:23 pm
FUCK NIXON/FROST! What this world needs is SPEER/GOLDSTEIN!
Question: WHERE CAN ONE BUY BACK ISSUES OF SCREW??? Also, where can one find old episodes of Midnight Blue?? The Blue Underground DVDs are fantastic, but I crave MORE, MORE, MORE!
June 12th, 2009 at 6:05 pm
Al, what are your thoughts on the recent HIV infections in porn?
June 13th, 2009 at 9:38 am
So when is Al Goldstein’s next blog post?
August 28th, 2009 at 12:45 am
Jeez, Al. Looks like people want to send you to meet your maker. Don’t go yet. Wait till football season ends.